For someone to be on the spectrum of the narcissist personality disorder, people would need at least five of the nine characteristics—one of those being Preoccupied with ultimate fantasies of unlimited success, their idea relationship, fantasies of brilliance, beauty, ultimate power and success.
The others are:-
- A belief they are special.
- Lack of empathy.
- Requires excessive admiration.
Signs of a narcissists preoccupation of ultimate success.
- Lives in a fantasy world.
- Exaggerating achievements.
- Exploits others.
- Doesn’t see others points of view.
- Denying their behaviour.
- Ideal views.
- Quick to anger if others go against them.
- Not giving unless they can take.
- Only loyal to their own needs.
- Requires praise if they do for others—criticism of others.
Narcissistic people are often in their own fantasy world, whatever that world is to that individual narcissist if they like breaking the rules some can exaggerate the rules they break if they like owning lots of things they can overstate how much they own. If some like helping in the community, they’ll go overboard with how much they help. As they believe themselves to be perfect, they do it convincing well, and like its normal as to them it is, they gaslight those around them to not see reality, as to a narcissist the only reality that matters is their own.
They exploit people to meet whatever need it is of that individual narcissist, they cheat people out of money, homes, belonging, dreams, hobbies, friends, family, self-worth, dignity, respect, health and wealth, confidence and happiness.
If another’s point of view doesn’t match the narcissist’s opinions, they will humiliate, shame, blame, intimidate and invalidate, in order to get the other person to question themselves and not feel enough.
Narcissists gaslight, lie, deny, project, and pass the blame of any of their own wrongdoing or mistakes onto those around them, as they don’t want to be exposed for their true selves as they seek their way to the top.
Their confidence is indeed a narcissists arrogance. Often narcissistic people are unpleasantly proud of who they are. They can act superior to others or come across as impolite, offensive, as they believe they know more than those around them, to a narcissist they’re the most important person in the room. Acting blatantly proud in showing an attitude that they are better than others, whatever that personal attitude is to the individual narcissist. They can act as they are above others, vain, often having to own the best home that they can afford or exploit from another, or the best clothes while talking badly of those around them.
They are quick to anger and rage, or those passive-aggressive silent treatments and sulks when things don’t go how the narcissist expects them to go, they take this as in-depth criticism as the reality gap of who they are and who they claim themselves to be closing in, and they need to regain control of those around them.
They are only loyal to their own needs or their need of you. Therefore they can come across as giving. However, that’s only if they can take. With some, all they want to claim is attention, validation and support, whilst they slowly and manipulatively take everything away from you, as they fear losing their supply, however, if they see someone new with something they want, they’ll happily discard and move on.
Anything a narcissist does manage to do for another is to meet a need of their own, and if they do something for another, they expect people to be eternally grateful to them.
They have a selective memory so they’ll happily forget the hurtful things they do, they’ll happily claim something didn’t happen. Yet, they’ll guilt trip with, ”after all I’ve done for you, ” and bring up one thing that they might have not even done for you in the past, and they will forget everything you do for them, yet remember the one time you said no to them.
Narcissists downplay their hurtful behaviour while exaggerating their negative behaviour. They’ll downplay or deny the things you do well, and exaggerate the things you don’t go so well.
Remember it’s ok for people to want to succeed in life, it’s not ok to exploit others in the process, with good intentions there is no wrong way or right way to live your life.
Why are narcissistic people so selfish?
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