A narcissist believes that rules don’t apply to them, but they do apply to those around them.There are Nine Characteristics Of The Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and one of these is;
A Sense Of Entitlement.
The narcissist’s entitlement, blends into their other characteristics, the beliefs they hold they are superior to those around them. Their arrogance, they are proud of who they are and how they treat others to get their needs met. They exploit others, to get their needs met with a lack of empathy to care. The grandiosity that they believe they are better than those around them. A requirement that they are deserving of special attention, they want admiration through love or fear, and the preoccupation of their own power and success, with no regard to who they hurt along the way.
They believe they have the right to anything and everything that they want. They think they deserve special treatment and privileges. That sense of entitlement is often why they get angry when they believe they’re being kept waiting. They will use the Silent Treatment, rage and provoke others if they feel their entitlement has been criticised. They expect those around them to conform to their demands.
With any narcissist, the main traits are the three E’s Entitlement, Exploitation and a lack of Empathy.A narcissist is a hypocrite as they believe they should be able to do as they please, yet those around them should do as they say and not as they do.
Entitlement is a belief the narcissist holds that they are deserving of special treatment or privileges, they believe that they have the rights to have what they want or do what they want, without consequences for their actions, those they will lay at some innocent person door.
The narcissist personality disorder is on a spectrum, and they would need at least five of the Characteristics to be professionally diagnosed with the disorder. The narcissists’ entitlement isn’t about having an opinion, or a belief. It’s not about wanting to visit someone or having a routine, it’s not having dreams or hobbies. We are allowed to have opinions that differ from others. We are allowed to have our beliefs that differ from others.
A narcissists entitlement is.
- An unreasonable demand that others should conform to their way, and they are deserving of special treatment.
- A belief they should not be made to wait.
- They don’t think they should have to queue up for things and can become very impatient.
- They don’t believe they have to pay their way, or they think others should pay more.
- They don’t believe they should work for a promotion, they believe it’s a given, and if it’s not given, then the other person sucked up to the boss.
- They think they can turn up late and everyone should be instantly grateful they turned up at all.
- They do not accept the word no.
- They will say their children get what the narcissist perceives as ’good quality.’ from them.
- They can try to blag their way into places, claiming to know the owner, some even saying ”Don’t you know who I am.” if that doesn’t work they can become aggressive and insulting.
- The will Intimidate staff to try and get their own way.
- They will point out others mistakes and gloat about people’s downfalls.
- Tantrum like a toddler when they don’t get their own way.
- They will Project their entitlement onto those close to them, with their Gaslighting words of ”Why do you have to be so unreasonable.” when you try to set a boundary with them. Or ” It’s not all about you.” when you try to have an opinion, or you’d like to do something.
- They might feel entitled to have control over your whereabouts, wanting your location settings turned on, wanting all your passwords, however, you’ll not be able to have theirs, it’ll not be a two-way street, only one way, the narcissist’s entitled way.
Society can unwittingly Enable the narcissist entitlement, as the narcissist will often intimidate people to get their own way, people often give them their own way either through fear or embarrassment to shut them up, which because the narcissist lacks Empathy. As they exploit those around them, they don’t always see it as people Fawning to their abusive behaviour. It just confirms in the narcissists’ mind that they are in control, that they are special and are entitled to be treated better than those around them. When people don’t, the narcissist doesn’t understand as others do, so they manipulate to get their own way.
- A narcissist will not Compromise if your opinion differs to theirs, they don’t believe your opinions matter, neither do your feelings. It’s their way, and they are always right. It’s a case of they have spoken, and if you speak against them, you will be punished.
- They expect others to take care of them, even though the narcissist is doing nothing in return. If you speak up about this, it’ll be ”After all I do for you.” there’s no 50/50 or 80/20 then 20/80 depending who’s in need. It’s the narcissist’s way it you get punished way. With a narcissist it’s we give, and they take, they only ever give if they have something greater than they can take.
- They can play nice, and come across as a genuine person, this is only to manipulate because they want something in return, the Admiration face when they will boast and brag, even exaggerate their achievements, to win someone over, so they can manipulate and take advantage of that person.
- When they don’t get what they want outcomes their envious face, as they feel entitled, they take this as an in-depth criticism and the tantrums begin, slowly breaking down people’s boundaries, with The Narcissists’ Triangulation. Pity plays, guilt trips, and more, they seek to take out those who they feel are not severing them as they should, not admiring them as they should, as they feel entitled to be treated.
- If they feel criticised, slighted or betrayed by another, they can hold a grudge for a long time, they can seem extraordinarily Jealous or envious of others, especially those who have something they want, they will put those people down any way they can, they will, of course, have a grand tail to spin of why they were the Victim, and we often then feel sorry for them and do all we can to support them, when in reality, they were never the victim, the one they hold a grudge against was the victim, and the narcissist is the perpetrator.
The best way to handle a narcissist entitlement is to safely walk away and no longer play.
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Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.
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