Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse, By Elizabeth Shaw – Life Coach.
Is narcissist afraid of anything?
Some empaths fear some of these things, so please remember narcissist personality disorder is on a spectrum. So if someone you know fears a couple of these things, if they don’t continually run around destroying lives time and time again, if they do not exploit others, they are not a narcissist.
They appear to be afraid of nothing, yet there are a few things they fear.
They deeply fear being exposed for who they truly are, they will fight against it, as they believe you caused them to be that way, they fear everyone believing you and making them accountable, as of course, a narcissist is never accountable for any damage they do. They will deny, deflect and withdraw. This is why they get in their first smearing you to others. As a liar, a crazy fool, you’ll be the abuse to all those around them and you.
They hate being made fun of, they feel criticism and they have no true sense of humour. They will laugh at you cruelly if you hurt yourself, they have no empathy, they have learnt from others how to fake laugh, but they can not stand the joke being on them. They view others as objects, they have an extremely false laugh when they are laughing along with others, the real laugh is extremely cruel.
Abandonment and rejection. That’s why if you threaten to leave them and they don’t have a back up, punish you, they fly into rage, get angry, intimidate and threaten you, if you say you’re leaving them, if you do manage to get away and they have no back up, they will love bomb you.
If you look happy in your new life, they will hoover or try to destroy you, possibly alternating Both.
When the narcissist is rejected it deeply hurts their pride and ego, as they feel entitled to have who and what they want whenever they want it. That the false selves, charm or pity play should be enough to draw anyone in and keep until they want to discard you.
Their true selves are lost, they depend on the attention of those around them, so when they don’t get the attention they require for survival. They struggle to survive.
When the narcissist is rejected and has no backup plan they are forced to be in touch with their own emptiness and nothing scares them more.
They will destroy you, just to get reactions to avoid their true selves.
You leaving them undermines their magnificence.
To be ignored, they can not stand being ignored, they need to be in the spotlight at all times. The removal of attention deeply criticises them, they need the attention, to escape from their true inner dark selves. They don’t care for positive or negative reactions, so long as they get a reaction from you, they will do anything to get that reaction.
They actually fear true intimacy, yes they can play the part, they can act the part, either they can not or will not let those true feelings of love rise, so they don’t get hurt, if this is down to being hurt and let down in the past, so they’ve locked love deep down, that can never come up, or if somewhere deep down they know how hurtful and destructive they are, yet cover this, where empaths question themselves if they are narcissistic because of their reactions, so do narcissistic people truly flip this that because of your reactions you truly are the crazy one to them? they fear-getting trapped in a long term intimate relationship, with obligations and duties. They fear true long term commitment and others seeing any of their true vulnerability’s, they will play the victim, but their real vulnerability’s they hide deep down, that’s if they have any.
Mirrors, the majority of narcissistic people love Mirrors and looking at their reflection. Mostly it’s the overt or somatic ones that will only actually look themselves in the eyes. Most of those will look themselves happily up and down, check the face out, a lot don’t look into their eyes when looking into a mirror As they grow old this gets less and less.
Having to face the truth about their flaws, which is why they use protection to avoid the blame and shift it all onto others.
The fear of others achieving more than them, why the belittle others, all that envy and jealousy, why they will swoop in and take everything away from you.
Being disrespected by those around them, they feel like they are above all others. They hate and being criticised, why they destroy, silent treatment. Discard, smear. All those who disrespect them, purely to revenge on those who do.
Getting old, getting left completely alone, They fear when they start to grow old and tired, they may start to find it increasingly difficult to manipulate and play games with those around them. As the again will be left with their empty soles. They fear to lose that charm, a lot will go more towards victim mode of all else fails when they age. They fear to lose their looks, they fear death.
Please add in comments anything you think they fear.
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