The Fragile Victim Narcissist.

The fragile narcissist is the one who plays the victim so well, often leading many to sympathise with them, and not walking away due to the guilt the victim narcissist shames others into feeling when they choose to walk away.

The Fragile, vulnerable narcissist.

The fragile narcissist tends to be more emotionally sensitive to criticism than other narcissists, having a more obvious low self-esteem and can be depressed, someone who’s been abused by a narcissist can come across as a fragile narcissist, from learned behaviour to protect themselves, when they are actually struggling with CPTSD. Fragile narcissists often get misdiagnosed with BPD. Those with BPD or CPTSD can get misdiagnosed as a narcissist.

Things to watch out for are exploitative behaviours, a sense of entitlement, envious of others and self-serving empathy, unwilling to care for others, they’ve always been hurt worse, lived through worse, had such a difficult life, and it’s always someone else’s fault.

They don’t usually have the looks of the somatic or the intellect of the cerebral so that they can turn towards intimidation and they will bully people to get their needs met.

The fragile narcissist can be very lazy, although they’ll often project and accuse you of being the lazy one. If they find a partner, they will be extremely reliant on them for everything. As with most narcissists, they will try and find someone who benefits the narcissist in some way, someone with money because they don’t work, someone with a home because they have nowhere to live.

They can have already alienated a lot of their family members. However, they spin the stories to those they meet of how much they did for their family, and how the family abused them. The most heartbreaking part is, in some cases, this is true if you were raised by a narcissist parent, you feel like you can connect and reach an understanding, not understanding the narcissist is using their story to exploit you.

The fragile narcissist often acts on impulse and learned behaviour for what works for them, they gaslight, lie, deny, blame-shifting and a project like most narcissists they have great a need to use people like any other narcissist.

The Hoover from a Fragile narcissist might not happen at all, or it can be one where they will play the victim, claiming illness, that they need your help. Once they realise you are no longer interested, they will seek someone new instead as this is easier for them.

The fragile doesn’t always embark on a smear campaign if they do it’s less to get at you and more to gain sympathy from those around them.

The fragile narcissist often has a victim mentality. They are always playing the victim, and always require a lot of sympathetic attention; they are often highly sensitive, they take offence to the slightest perceived criticism, and as narcissists do they make everything about them, if you’ve suffered a loss, theirs was far worse, if you had a bad day, they would bring it onto how theirs was far worse, offering you no emotional support and expecting you to forget about your needs and emotional support them.

The fragile narcissist will often be ill, as this is the perfect excuse to get them out of doing anything. Headaches is a great one they play on, as you can not tell if they genuinely have a headache or not. Also, bad backs, if they can not pinpoint an illness, they’ll often make one up, this is why headaches are the best that they use, this is also a tactic to use to gain more sympathy from those around them.

The fragile narcissists first line of narcissistic defences will often be, passive-aggressive and shutting people out opting to use the silent treatment or they can turn to the sulks or pity plays as their preferred manipulation method to punish others. Like many narcissists, they will always play the victim card because they will always see themselves as the victim.

The fragile narcissist will usually play on the woe is me, helpless victim attitude to con people into looking after them. The Sponge of people, as they are often in debt themselves, and will most often financial abuse those who love them, through guilt trips and pity plays, like many narcissists, due to their inability to create internal happiness they can have a substance abuse problem. Most people will feel sorry for the fragile or class them as a good for nothing, backing up the narcissist’s stories that no one will give them a break, often because when people do give them a break, the fragile narcissist takes advantage.

Often the fragile can also resort to physical violence, or punching, throwing things, when they’re not getting their own way.

They will not take responsibility for their own behaviour, and if they do in a moment, it’s only to get their own needs met and further down the line it’ll be your fault, or someone else fault.

The fragile narcissist can be difficult to spot as they are more covert in behaviour, and we can feel a lot more guilt walking away from them as they are the masters of manipulation when it comes to guilt trips.

23 signs you could be dealing with a vulnerable narcissist.

Click the links below to join, Elizabeth Shaw – Life Coach on social media, for more information on Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse.

On Facebook. 

On YouTube.

On Twitter.

On Instagram. 

On Pinterest. 

On LinkedIn.

The online courses available by Elizabeth Shaw.

For the full course.

Click here to sign up for the full, Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse, with a link in the course to a free, hidden online support group with fellow survivors. 

For the free course.

Click here to sign up for the free online starter course. 

To help with overcoming the trauma bond and anxiety course.

Click here for the online course to help you break the trauma bond, and those anxiety triggers. 

All about the narcissist Online course.

Click here to learn more about the narcissist personality disorder.

The narcissists counter-parenting.

Click here for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse, and information on co-parenting with a narcissist.

Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.

Click here for Elizabeth Shaw’s Recommended reading list for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse.

The Grandiose Narcissist.

If someone’s entitled, has a lack of empathy, exploits others, whatever they are, find a way to safely get out and stay out.

People who have the narcissist personality disorder, are extremely self-centred, they are arrogant, they exploit those around them, they lack the empathy to care for those they hurt, they are often very envious of others achievements, they believe they are special and feel entitled to receive excessive admiration, they are often preoccupied with their idea of power and success.

Those who have the disorder are very reluctant to change, as they go around, causing endless problems and heartache to those who love them. Yet, the narcissist will blame the very people the narcissists’ actions are hurting for why the narcissist themselves is not living the life that narcissist believes themselves to be entitled to.

The grandiose narcissist is often very grand flamboyant individual usually intelligent and extremely good with people.

They are extremely successful at drawing people in with ease. They may own and run their own business and can be very talented individuals. Often they are extremely popular. People adore them and want to be around them. They are ambitious, highly driven with very high energy levels.

They make others feel like they are the only person in the room. Charming charismatic they will crush people who get in their way.

Signs of a grandiose narcissist.

  • Unrealistic sense of self.
  • They are preoccupied with self.
  • Self-absorbed.
  • Expects special treatment.
  • Sees themselves as above others, intellect, class, beauty etc.
  • Exaggerates talents.
  • Lies about the things they’ve done.
  • Puts others down.
  • Unrealistic high standards.
  • Talks about themselves a lot.
  • Boastful.
  • Common rules don’t apply to them. They do to you.
  • Selfish.
  • Quick to anger.
  • Lack of empathy, not caring for those they hurt.
    Extremely self-centred.
    Extremely stubborn,
    No respect for boundaries,
    They will still play the victim when needed.
    They are manipulative,
    The tell countless lies,
    They are false,
    They exaggerate their achievements,
    They will manipulate anything, everything and everyone.
    They feel superior to others.
    They have a sense of entitlement.
    They have a very inflated ego.
    They dominate and exploit, lying and cheating their way to the top.
    They see others as an extension of themselves.
    They can be prone to boredom.
    They are extremely envious of others and very egotistical.
    Overt very arrogant in-your-face and very assertive.
    They can be impulsive and big risk-takers.

Grandiose narcissists are more aware of their admiration face, and their need to pass off an image of perfection to the outside world, often overestimating their own capabilities to themselves and to others, if they fail to live up to their own high standards, they blame others and often hold grudges against those they accuse.

Grandiose narcissists are often the ones where one or two people see their envious face. Yet, if they speak out to others, the people they speak to continually enable the narcissist’s behaviour usually unwittingly say “really, they’re great with me.” As the grandiose narcissist uses their superficial charm, to love bomb people, into believing they’re someone they’re not.

Grandiose narcissists often come across as having very high self-esteem as they exaggerate their achievements to sell themselves to those around them, usually to cover their deeply hidden insecurities that they themselves might not be aware of, if they are, they’ll make sure no other become aware of them, as they boast about themselves and their achievements to keep up their image in the eyes of themselves and those around them.

The grandiose narcissist is extremely manipulative with gaslighting. Often they use psychological abuse over physical abuse; they will smear anyone who the narcissist believes had gone against them. Usually, due to the narcissist, (somatic.) those with the looks, ( Cerebral.) those with the intellect, charm, popularity and fan club, people will tend to believe the narcissists grandiose lies.

Grandiose narcissists often see themselves as better than others, and their arrogance.

  • Unpleasantly proud of themselves, often putting others down, to raise themselves up.
  • Can not see their weaknesses.
  • Can not see their own mistakes.
  • Refusal to admit fault.
  • Regularly breaks agreements.
  • Rarely to never saying sorry. “I’m sorry for you.”
  • Flaunts success.
  • Argumentative with others, yet blames others for the argument.
  • Complains when things don’t go their way.
  • Pushy and loud.
  • Always wants to be in control very demanding.
  • Points out other peoples flaws.
  • Averse to criticism.
  • Stubborn.
  • Overbearing.
  • Always puts their needs before others.

Often this comes across as confidence, as the grandiose narcissist holds their belief within themselves that they are special, they can seemingly be confident within themselves.

The grandiose narcissists are incredibly dominant and very charming, which draws people to them, they easily seduce, and when their needs are no longer being met, they move quickly onto the devaluation and discard phase. When their attempts to exploit others aren’t successful, or their demands and self-entitlement are not being met. They have anger and rage. They will destroy others that don’t conform to their demands.

Recognising patterns of other people’s behaviour helps us walk free from their behaviour and stops us giving chances to those who no longer deserve our chances.

Signs you’re dealing with a grandiose narcissist.

Click the links below to join, Elizabeth Shaw – Life Coach on social media, for more information on Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse.

On Facebook. 

On YouTube.

On Twitter.

On Instagram. 

On Pinterest. 

On LinkedIn.

The online courses available by Elizabeth Shaw.

For the full course.

Click here to sign up for the full, Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse, with a link in the course to a free, hidden online support group with fellow survivors. 

For the free course.

Click here to sign up for the free online starter course. 

To help with overcoming the trauma bond and anxiety course.

Click here for the online course to help you break the trauma bond, and those anxiety triggers. 

All about the narcissist Online course.

Click here to learn more about the narcissist personality disorder.

The narcissists counter-parenting.

Click here for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse, and information on co-parenting with a narcissist.

Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.

Click here for Elizabeth Shaw’s Recommended reading list for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse.

The Different Narcissistic Personality Types.

Personality types of narcissists. 

Trying to work out if you’re dealing with a narcissist or not can get you looking at lots of different literature and listening to lots of audio, as those light bulb moments hit one by one, and all those dots we didn’t see while we lived it start to connect together. The fact we begin to Google someone’s behaviour or see a meme or a quote that describes our life or someone we are dealing with is a major red flag you’re dealing with a toxic person. Narcissist or not abuse is abuse.

There are lots of words out there describing the different narcissistic personality types, so here’s a quick summary.

The narcissistic personality disorder is a disorder, and they do need to have at least five traits to have the disorder, these are.

1. Has a grandiose sense of self-importance. Exaggerating achievements and talents.

2. Preoccupied with ultimate success. Lives in a fantasy world of power, control, dominance, brilliance.

3. Superiority. Believing they are special and above all others.

4. Entitled. Feels entitled to have all their own needs met, demanding, manipulative and controlling.

5. Excessive admiration. A constant need for excessive admiration.

6. Exploits others. Takes advantage and manipulates others to get their own needs met.

7. Lack of empathy. Can not truly connect with how others are feeling.

8. Envious of others, believing others are envious of them. Hate people who have something they want, also believing others are envious of them.

9. Arrogant and haughty behaviour. An exaggerated sense of their own abilities and behaviours.

Types Of Narcissists. 

There are four types of narcissists and four subtypes.

Classic the grandiose.

  • Grandiose sense of self.
  • Impressive.
  • Arrogant.
  • Preoccupied with self.
  • Unpleasantly proud of themselves.
  • All about impressing others.
  • Charming.
  • Often has the money, cars, home.
  • Stubborn.
  • Self-centred.
  • No respect for others boundaries.
  • Exaggerates achievements.
  • Inflated ego.
  • Humiliates others.
  • Dominant.
  • Liars.
  • Exploitative.

They know everything, it’s their way or the high way, these are the ones you are most likely to read about, self-centred, arrogant, full of charm, often having lots of supporters around them.

The Fragile, vulnerable narcissist.

  • Easily offended.
  • Withdrawn.
  • Plays the victim.
  • Very woe is me.
  • Passive-aggressive.
  • Sulks.
  • Silent treatments.
  • Believes the world is against them.
  • Extremely envious of others.

Tend to be more emotionally sensitive to criticism than other narcissists, have low self-esteem and can be depressed, someone who’s been abused by a narcissist can come across as a vulnerable narcissist, from learned behaviour to protect themselves, when they are actually struggling with CPTSD. Vulnerable narcissists often get misdiagnosed with BPD. Those with BPD or CPTSD can get misdiagnosed as a narcissist.

Malignant.

  • Evil in nature or effect.
  • Superficial charm.
  • Relentlessly aggressive.
  • Pathological liar.
  • Sadism.
  • Deliberately causing suffering to others.
  • Antisocial behaviour.
  • Little to no empathy.
  • Zero responsibility.
  • No remorse.
  • Extreme envy.
  • Abrupt mood swings.
  • Superior.
  • Arrogant.

The most pathological and, hurtful of all narcissists, they have no sense of their inner worth, meaning they are full of rage and extremely vindictive, they are extremely dangerous and will stop at nothing to harm others, they are extremely unstable and often unstoppable, they will encourage others to fight on their behalf, they are extremely impulsive, they have no empathy or guilt, taking lots of rash hurtful actions towards others, they have an excessive rage within themselves. They have the ability to change reality for millions of people, their crazy internal reality, makes those around them believe that crazy reality, in the millions if allowed to do so. They have no limits, and there is nothing they will not do to serve themselves.

Communal.

  • Super nice to others.
  • Do-gooders.
  • Charming.
  • Helps select people if it makes them look good.
  • Seems to play by the rules.
  • Irritable
  • Sulky.
  • Acts like the play by the rules.
  • Seeks excessive praise.
  • Exploits peoples kindness.
  • Superficial empathy.

They seem to sacrifice themselves for others, very community-oriented, coming across as good people, they can winge and whine, they need praise for all that they do, they are passive-aggressive, those sulks and silent treatments, controls you by giving you things, and expecting eternal gratitude, will happily trip you up, so they can claim they picked you back up. They seem on the outside to work so hard and do so much for others, yet their true behaviour is textbook narcissism. They are a backhanded do-gooder, may appear to listen and help others, they are actually helping themselves. They will always let you know which charity they’ve been to, how many people they’ve helped, etc., they are after the attention and praise.

Introverted or Covert.

  • Introverted.
  • Shy.
  • Sly.
  • Plays victim.
  • Hidden passive-aggressive manipulation.
  • Impatient.
  • Extremely envious of others.
  • Self-entitlement.

They are harder to identify, they are very fragile, very ashamed people, extremely sensitive to setbacks and criticism, they are very woe is me. They’ve suffered more than anybody else, extraordinarily envious and jealous not understanding why others get stuff they do not. They can be passive-aggressive, and they can be very antisocial. They will continually nag if they work, they often change jobs fast, they get bored very quickly, they are extremely lazy.

Extroverted or Overts.

  • An exaggerated sense of self.
  • Grandiose.
  • Inflated ego.
  • Preoccupied with self.
  • Lacks self-awareness.
  • Oblivious to impact they have on others.
  • Extraverted.
  • High risk-takers.
  • Dominant.
  • Envious.
  • Competitive.
  • Entitled.

Believe they have a right to everything and anything. Arrogant, self-centred, lack of empathy, believing they are special and above everyone else, they are better than all those around them. No respect, stubborn and self-centred.

Cerebral.

  • Acts superior.
  • Intelligent.
  • Calculated.
  • High functioning.
  • Calculated.
  • Can seem to play by the rules.
  • Can control inner rage.
  • The belief they are superior.
  • Preoccupied with ultimate success.

Cerebral narcissist pretends to know it all, and they use all their knowledge, real or fake intellect. The maintenance of their body is a chore they can not be bothered with it, so they use real of fake intelligence to get the attention they crave from those around them.

Somatic.

  • Show off.
  • Pride In appearance.
  • Vain.
  • Impatient.
  • Charming.
  • Arrogant.
  • Entitled.

Somatic, parade their body and looks and brag about their physical selves. Brags about their sexual conquests. They exploit their body’s to gain the attention of others that they crave so badly.

The best way to spot a narcissist is their envy of others, their sense of entitlement, willingness to exploit people and lack of empathy to care for the pain they cause others.

Click the links below to join, Elizabeth Shaw – Life Coach on social media, for more information on Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse.

On Facebook. 

On YouTube.

On Twitter.

On Instagram. 

On Pinterest. 

On LinkedIn.

The online courses are available by Elizabeth Shaw.

For the full course.

Click here to sign up for the full, Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse, with a link in the course to a free, hidden online support group with fellow survivors. 

For the free course.

Click here to sign up for the free online starter course. 

To help with overcoming the trauma bond and anxiety course.

Click here for the online course to help you break the trauma bond, and those anxiety triggers. 

All about the narcissist Online course.

Click here to learn more about the narcissist personality disorder.

The narcissists counter-parenting.

Click here for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse, and information on co-parenting with a narcissist.

Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.

Click here for Elizabeth Shaw’s Recommended reading list for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse.

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Red Flags Of A Narcissists Preoccupation With Fantisies Of Ultimate Success.

For someone to be on the spectrum of the narcissist personality disorder, people would need at least five of the nine characteristics—one of those being Preoccupied with ultimate fantasies of unlimited success, their idea relationship, fantasies of brilliance, beauty, ultimate power and success.

The others are:-

  1. A belief they are special.
  2. Exploitative.
  3. Grandiose.
  4. Envy.
  5. Lack of empathy.
  6. Entitlement.
  7. Requires excessive admiration.
  8. Arrogance.

Signs of a narcissists preoccupation of ultimate success.

  • Lives in a fantasy world.
  • Exaggerating achievements.
  • Exploits others.
  • Doesn’t see others points of view.
  • Liars.
  • Denying their behaviour.
  • Arrogant.
  • Ideal views.
  • Quick to anger if others go against them.
  • Not giving unless they can take.
  • Only loyal to their own needs.
  • Requires praise if they do for others—criticism of others.

Narcissistic people are often in their own fantasy world, whatever that world is to that individual narcissist if they like breaking the rules some can exaggerate the rules they break if they like owning lots of things they can overstate how much they own. If some like helping in the community, they’ll go overboard with how much they help. As they believe themselves to be perfect, they do it convincing well, and like its normal as to them it is, they gaslight those around them to not see reality, as to a narcissist the only reality that matters is their own.

They exploit people to meet whatever need it is of that individual narcissist, they cheat people out of money, homes, belonging, dreams, hobbies, friends, family, self-worth, dignity, respect, health and wealth, confidence and happiness.

If another’s point of view doesn’t match the narcissist’s opinions, they will humiliate, shame, blame, intimidate and invalidate, in order to get the other person to question themselves and not feel enough.

Narcissists gaslight, lie, deny, project, and pass the blame of any of their own wrongdoing or mistakes onto those around them, as they don’t want to be exposed for their true selves as they seek their way to the top.

Their confidence is indeed a narcissists arrogance. Often narcissistic people are unpleasantly proud of who they are. They can act superior to others or come across as impolite, offensive, as they believe they know more than those around them, to a narcissist they’re the most important person in the room. Acting blatantly proud in showing an attitude that they are better than others, whatever that personal attitude is to the individual narcissist. They can act as they are above others, vain, often having to own the best home that they can afford or exploit from another, or the best clothes while talking badly of those around them.

They are quick to anger and rage, or those passive-aggressive silent treatments and sulks when things don’t go how the narcissist expects them to go, they take this as in-depth criticism as the reality gap of who they are and who they claim themselves to be closing in, and they need to regain control of those around them.

They are only loyal to their own needs or their need of you. Therefore they can come across as giving. However, that’s only if they can take. With some, all they want to claim is attention, validation and support, whilst they slowly and manipulatively take everything away from you, as they fear losing their supply, however, if they see someone new with something they want, they’ll happily discard and move on.

Anything a narcissist does manage to do for another is to meet a need of their own, and if they do something for another, they expect people to be eternally grateful to them.

They have a selective memory so they’ll happily forget the hurtful things they do, they’ll happily claim something didn’t happen. Yet, they’ll guilt trip with, ”after all I’ve done for you, ” and bring up one thing that they might have not even done for you in the past, and they will forget everything you do for them, yet remember the one time you said no to them.

Narcissists downplay their hurtful behaviour while exaggerating their negative behaviour. They’ll downplay or deny the things you do well, and exaggerate the things you don’t go so well.

Remember it’s ok for people to want to succeed in life, it’s not ok to exploit others in the process, with good intentions there is no wrong way or right way to live your life.

Why are narcissistic people so selfish?

Click on the links below to join, Elizabeth Shaw – Life Coach on social media, for more information on Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse.

On Facebook. 

On YouTube.

On Twitter.

On Instagram. 

On Pinterest. 

On LinkedIn.

The online courses available by Elizabeth Shaw.

For the full course.

Click here to sign up for the full, Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse, with a link in the course to a free, hidden online support group with fellow survivors. 

For the free course.

Click here to sign up for the free online starter course. 

To help with overcoming the trauma bond and anxiety course.

Click here for the online course to help you break the trauma bond, and those anxiety triggers. 

All about the narcissist Online course.

Click here to learn more about the narcissist personality disorder.

The narcissists counter-parenting.

Click here for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse, and information on co-parenting with a narcissist.

Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.

Click here for Elizabeth Shaw’s Recommended reading list for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse.

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