Narcissist shares the traits of entitlement, arrogance, lack of empathy, preoccupation with their ideal, seeking excessive admiration, grandiose, exploitative, a belief they are superior, however, how they supply their need for excessive attention and how they exploit others to gain that attention depends on the internal beliefs of the Individual narcissist. Narcissists lack the empathy to care for how their behaviour affects others, only if their consequences for their actions.
- Super nice to others.
- Helps select people if it makes them look good.
- Seems to play by the rules.
- Acts like the play by the rules.
- Seeks excessive praise.
- Exploits peoples kindness.
- Superficial empathy.
The communal narcissist can be the do-gooder as they want all those around them to acknowledge the good they do and praise them, they gain their excessive admiration by doing good for others, but not for the good of others, for the benefits of the narcissist themselves.
Like many, they will run people down, blame the person for being in the way, help the person up, and except praise because they helped the person the ran over, which is highly confusing as people try to work out is the narcissist sinking them or saving them.
The communal narcissists often see themselves as the most trustworthy person who makes no mistakes and belives all others should see them as this also.
The communal narcissist wants to be known, seen, heard and respected as the most helpful and most giving person there is.
The grandiosity part of the communal narcissist is that they see themselves as superior in helpfulness towards others. Therefore they have to be known as the nicest person In whatever it is they do.
Their sense of superiority comes from the fact they believe they sacrifice themselves to help others, and not because they enjoy helping others, because they want others to be eternally grateful, to gain enablers that will tell others just how wonderful the communal narcissist is.
Their entitlement means, they believe when they do for others, others should be willing to do for them, often not taking no for an answer and guilt-tripping those around them unto doing what they want in more covertly hidden manipulation methods, as they’re seen to be helpful many couldn’t imagine them to be so untrustworthy, so those who do notice are often scapegoated by the communal narcissist and done with the narcissists flying monkeys doing the smear campaign, usually meaning the communal narcissist doesn’t see themselves as the problem, they can even draw the scapegoat back in by playing the peacemaker to come across as friendly.
They have very little patience if they give, they expect to receive if they don’t receive they believe others are taking advantage of them.
They enjoy enforcing rules on others, they really enjoy catching people who break the rules, not because the narcissist themselves believes the rules apply to them, because they believe they apply to others and take great pleasure in seeing others getting punished, as they are envious of others they take great pride in boasting about others mistakes.
They will help people, not to help people, they’ll pull people up so far just to sink them again, when they’re actually smearing that persons name to gain attention as the communal narcissist plays the hero, of just how much they’re trying to help.
The communal narcissist believes they deserve special treatment because they’re the most trustworthy person in the room.
The communal narcissist believes themselves and sells themselves as the best listener, and they can be listening. However, they’re only listening for information they can use against others.
They can class themselves as the best parent ever, however, whatever they do isn’t in the best interest of the child, it’s in the best interest of looking good to others or manipulating people into believing they’re something they’re not.
The communal can seem like everybody’s friend in public, however, in private, they can be extremely vindictive and spiteful.
They seem to sacrifice themselves for others, very community-oriented, coming across as good people, they can winge and whine, they need praise for all that they do, they are passive-aggressive, those sulks and silent treatments, controls you by giving you things, and expecting eternal gratitude, will happily trip you up, so they can claim they picked you back up. They seem on the outside to work so hard and do so much for others, yet their true behaviour is textbook narcissism. They are a backhanded do-gooder, may appear to listen and help others, they are actually helping themselves. They will always let you know which charity they’ve been to, how many people they’ve helped, etc., they are after the attention and praise.
Communal narcissist might not intentionally go around deceiving others, it can be a belief within themselves. With their lack in empathy for others that they are often unaware of within themselves, they don’t recognise the hurt they cause others, as they blame others for the pain they’re in.
Stop explaining and start disarming.
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Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.