Any relationship break up is tough; you’ve shared so much together, have hopes, and made dreams and future plans together. With a narcissist, all the added manipulation all that trauma bond, from the highs and lows, all the things you’ve lost along the way, makes it extremely hard to overcome, you are not alone.
That added to the fact you’ve most likely been cheated on, lied to, disrespected, and taken advantage of, then they move straight on and flaunt how happy they are with the new persons, just adds to your pain. With the fear of losing them, not knowing which direction your life will take you in now, how lost and broken you feel. Your brain gets you doing irrational things to keep them close, you become so focused and fixated on the narcissist, who’s created the person you’ve become, they created all those emotions of emptiness and pain. You’ve lost the love for yourself, you’ve lost the trust in yourself, you may have lost a whole lot more.
In this horrible situation, but there are great lessons to be learned.
The lesson is there to trust and listen to your instincts.
The lessons are there to watch a person’s actions and not just listen to the words.
The lesson is there to observe what’s actually happening around you and not to absorb.
This lesson is there to keep your boundaries, your self-respect. To know that sometimes in life, you have to stand up for yourself, and say no to others.
When you start listening to your instinct, you’ll get courage from it to move forward in your life. When you learn what a narcissist is, and what they have done to you.
Love still exists. Learn to forgive and love yourself again. It wasn’t you who hurt you. It wasn’t love that hurt you. It was someone who was incapable of caring, loving, respecting, giving, that hurt you. Someone who lies by feeding you a dream, then cruelly snatching it away, but also crushing everything about you in the process.
You’re not Naive, you’re not stupid, or daft, you’re an incredible person, who gave it your all. You know how painful it is, as do others. You may even be thinking. “ it’s all my fault.” “If only I’d had ???” It is not your fault.
When a narcissist treats you like this, the reflection is on them, and who they are, not you.
It’s their deep hidden insecurity’s, their lack of self-worth, their lack of self-esteem, their lack of love, their manipulation, their triangulation, and so much more. All those things they keep so very well hidden from others, as they can not admit it to themselves, they just have to steal from others, then blame others for everything, they need power and control, and they’ll never be accountable. They cheat because they have no respect for themselves.
They were never worthy of your love, for you are a better person.
Click on the links below to join, Elizabeth Shaw – Life Coach on social media, for more information on Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse.
The two faces of a narcissist.
Ride to recovery.