It’s the hard enough when someone leaves you. It’s even harder with that trauma bond if they were a narcissist. It’s incredibly hard to walk away from that narcissist, even if you know that’s what you need to do for your own sanity. Even if you’ve been separated for a while, it can still be hard.
You question everything, not only your hopes and dreams with that person, what you were striving for together, was it you? Was it them? But also, who was that person and who are you now?
What you need to remember is you’re not letting go of that person. That narcissist doesn’t even know themselves, let alone other people. What you are letting go of is any future pain. You may at one point have thought you were with the right person until that self-doubt crept in. You don’t want need or deserve that self-doubt. You are letting go of that self-doubt. You don’t need to be with someone who doesn’t love or care about you, at least not in the same ways you do them. You don’t need someone who doesn’t respect you. They are not the right person for you. You don’t need to spend time with someone that’s only going to take everything away from you. They’re not going to make you happy. Even worse, they’ll do their best to make you miserable.
Even when you are at your best, you’ll never be good enough for the wrong person.
When you’re at your worst, the right person will be there for you and help pick you up, not keep dragging you under with them.
Remember you’re now free to be happy, change your thoughts to positive outcomes for you, positive things will start coming your way, be your own beautiful self, live life your own loving, kind way. The wrong person will try and destroy you. The right person will walk by your side and raise you up to an even better person.
Start by raising yourself back up, creating your own new dreams, then keep achieving, and it’ll soon become natural to you.
Writing down all those negatives of the relationship, and why you are far better off without them, knowing that if you stay or take them back, you’ll most likely be crying on every birthday for the rest of your life. Crying now is short term pain for long term gain, working on new dreams and a new life for you, healthier and happier.
You can, and you will recover from this.
The narcissist’s illusion.
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Hello, I’m Liz. I'm the slightly 🙄 dyslexic Blogger (So my grammar and punctuation aren't always the best.) who enjoys writing, and if I can overcome my fears and do it anyway, so can you. I have a YouTube channel which being dyslexic, my words are not always pronounced correctly, yet I still have some fantastic support from a fantastic community of survivors. If you want to do anything in life, half the battle is facing your fears and getting started. I am not a Doctor or a Councillor. I'm a mum and get the pleasure to raise five incredible boys. I'm a life coach. I’m a survivor of narcissistic abuse. I would like to raise as much awareness as possible about the Narcissist Personality Disorder, to give people more understanding of what they've been through, more knowledge so hopefully, people know the signs so don’t get involved in the first place, ways to get out safely, help with all the counter-parenting the narcissist throws in, help with whoever the narcissist is in your life, and most importantly recovery from narcissistic abuse, so you can move past it and have an incredible life that you do deserve.💜
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