Narcissists and the Lies they might tell you, about those around them.
- “We are just friends. ” They say it to emphasise that might be the case at the moment. They may have been something in the past, someone the narcissist is keeping around. The friend is hoping the narcissist will change so they can get the idealisation back. It may be someone new. They might be lining them up to replace you. They are using them to triangulate you. A narcissist is never just friends with anyone. Same-sex or opposite-sex. They have to be getting something from them, even if it’s just borrowing money. A narcissist does not know what the meaning of friendship is. Only their own meaning.
- “I’m so proud of my son or daughter” means the narcissist is a high achiever. They expect their children to achieve too. They believe their children are a part of them and an extension of themselves. They expect their children to do what the narcissist wants them to do, not to be themselves. Not to have a mind of their own. They will push them through manipulation to succeed in sports. If they don’t get top grades, they will be disappointed as the narcissist believes the children have failed them. Silent Treatment may follow when they believe the children have failed them. Yet when the children do well. The narcissist will say, “ They get their brain from me, not the other parent “, and “ They get all their sporting abilities from me. I taught them everything they know” yes because they once kicked a football around with them, it’s all down to the Narcissist’s hard work! The narcissist will take all the credit to take the spotlight away from their own children and put it on themselves. They’re not proud of them at all. The narcissist is proud of themselves.
- “He/she abused me” the narcissist’s ex is a toxic person. The narcissist will claim they did everything for them. The narcissist will tell you they gave their all for the relationship to work for the ex to Lie, manipulate, control and abuse, even stole money from them. They even started seeing their best friend. The narcissist will claim there’s something wrong with the ex. If you meet them to watch out, they will lie. The narcissist will tell you it would be best if they didn’t know about you and stayed away from them for your safety. The narcissist will claim that they escaped the ex, that the ex will come after them because the ex can not let them go, Oh and you’ll believe the narcissist in that love bombing. After all, they treat you so well. Also, the ex is probably acting somewhat crazy but not for the reasons you’ve been told, more because they’re being stalked, lied about, smeared, and that ex is trying to defend themselves.
Was the narcissist talking about their ex? Nope, they were describing themselves,
Lies, they might tell you about exes video for more information.
- “My family are trouble”, they will tell you their parents weren’t around for them when they were growing up, their parents much preferred the sibling to them. How their parents just don’t like them. How their sibling turned out just like their parents, Completely selfish, and only achieved because of the help that the narcissist gave their sibling as their parents failed them both. The sibling just didn’t see this. If it weren’t for the narcissist, they wouldn’t be where they are now. They will say, “ I wish my family were like yours. My family is just jealous of me. They always insult me. I get nothing from them. I had it tough growing up. Yes, my family seems nice on the surface, it’s all a mask”.
- “They are a liar ” about an old friend followed by “ yes, we used to be friends, but they slept with one of my exes while we were still together. That’s why we split up. Or I lent them some money. I didn’t know they had a gambling/substance abuse debt, they didn’t pay the debt, they just gambled more and never paid me back. They came back, asking for more, and I said no. Instead of being thankful, they started to tell others it was me that owed them. They are telling complete lies to anyone and everyone that would listen. Don’t trust them. That’s why I have nothing to do with them.
In most of these situations, the narcissist is just talking about themselves, deflecting as always, because yes, of course, it’s never them. It’s always someone else’s fault for everything they say or do. They will simply never be accountable.
Click on the links below to join, Elizabeth Shaw – Life Coach on social media, for more information on Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse.
When the narcissist moves straight on.