The Manipulative Tactics of Narcissists: Rewriting History and Gaslighting

The Manipulative Tactics of Narcissists: Rewriting History and Gaslighting.


Narcissists are individuals who possess an excessive sense of self-importance, an insatiable need for admiration, and a lack of empathy towards others. They employ various manipulative tactics to protect their fragile self-image and avoid taking responsibility for their actions. One of their most damaging strategies involves rewriting history and gaslighting, to escape accountability and maintain their desired narrative. This article will explore how narcissists utilise phrases, provoke emotions, and distort reality to suit their own agenda, be perceived as heroes or victims, sell false beliefs, and gain support while rewriting history.

Avoiding Responsibility:
Narcissists rarely take responsibility for their actions, choosing instead to deflect blame onto others. Statements such as “It wasn’t me” or “It’s not my fault” are their go-to responses in order to distance themselves from any wrongdoing. By refusing to acknowledge their faults, they effectively rewrite history, altering the truth in their favour and portraying themselves as faultless.

Distorting Perceptions:
Narcissists often employ gaslighting techniques to manipulate and distort the thoughts and feelings of those around them. They use phrases like “They had it coming” or “They deserved it” to justify hurting others. By convincing themselves and others that their actions were justified, they create a distorted sense of moral superiority, presenting themselves as heroes performing acts of justice. This distortion enables them to avoid feelings of guilt or remorse and justifies their behaviours within their own minds.

False Promises and Deception:
In their quest for validation and control, narcissists frequently make promises they have no intention of keeping. When these promises inevitably fail to materialise, they resort to gaslighting by insisting they never made such claims with those “I never said that.” By denying any memory or responsibility for their promises, they keep the focus on the perceived shortcomings of others, eroding trust and rewriting history within the minds of those around them.

The Envy Rewrite:
Narcissists commonly display a strong sense of envy towards others and often believe that others envy them in return. To turn this belief into reality, they engage in strategies that provoke jealousy. By instilling competition and manipulating others’ emotions, they create situations where their associates begin to display signs of envy. Then, when you try to communicate your valid feelings with them, they say, “What’s wrong is somebody jealous.” or “You’ve got trust issues.” This perceived envy becomes their narrative, allowing them to maintain their illusion of superiority and becoming a means to control and manipulate those around them.

Emotional Manipulation and Gaslighting:
Central to gaslighting is the narcissist’s ability to undermine the emotional stability of their victims. They utilise tactics such as mockery, humiliation, criticism, and putting their victims down. When the victims react naturally to such mistreatment, the narcissist accuses them of being “too sensitive,” “overreacting,” or “not being able to take a joke.” By shifting the blame onto the victim, the narcissist successfully manipulates their perception, causing them to question their own values and beliefs instead of holding the narcissist accountable for their actions.

Selfish Demands and Accusations:
Narcissists possess an insatiable need for attention and demand to be prioritised in everything. When their desires are not met, they accuse others of being “stubborn,” “selfish,” “awkward,” or “difficult.” By shifting blame onto their victims, the narcissist avoids acknowledging their own selfishness and maintains their perception of entitlement.

Driving Victims into Despair:
When all else fails, narcissists resort to emotional abuse to gain a reaction from their victims. By chipping away at their mental well-being using tactics such as constant criticism and belittling, they push their victims into states of anxiety and depression. Once the victims react, they label them as “crazy” or “unstable,” further gaslighting and manipulating perceptions for sympathy and support.


Narcissists employ a range of manipulative tactics, including rewriting history and gaslighting, to escape accountability. They use phrases, provoke emotions, and distort reality to present themselves as heroes or victims. These tactics enable them to sell false beliefs, maintain control, and gain support from those who are easily deceived. Recognising these manipulative strategies is crucial to protect oneself from their harmful effects and prevent the perpetuation of their false narratives.

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Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with (Sponsored.) BetterHelp. where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse. 

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