Manipulative Tactics of Narcissists Unveiled: How to Recognise and Protect Yourself.
This article examines the deceptive strategies employed by narcissists to exploit and manipulate their victims. By analysing the tactics employed during the idealisation stage, attention-seeking behaviour, environmental manipulation, gossiping and triangulation, emotional manipulation, victim-playing, false promises, and the hoovering technique, individuals can gain a better understanding of narcissistic behaviour and protect themselves from falling into their traps.
- Flattery vs. Compliments:
One way narcissists manipulate their victims is through flattery rather than genuine compliments. By gathering information about the victim’s needs, wants, and desires, narcissists use this knowledge to exploit their insecurities and establish control over them. Initially showering the victim with attention and future plans, the narcissist gradually withdraws to make the victim work harder for their attention. Furthermore, confidential information shared by the victim is later used against them for manipulation.
- Fishing for Compliments:
In order to boost their self-esteem and maintain their inflated ego, narcissists often fish for compliments from those around them, including friends, family, coworkers, and even via social media. This behaviour is prevalent in both overt and covert narcissists.
- Environment Setting:
Narcissists frequently provoke their victims to elicit a reaction, allowing them to shift blame, play the victim, or enforce the silent treatment to manipulate their victims into compliance. By gaslighting and creating a tense atmosphere, the narcissist undermines the victim’s sense of reality, making them highly dependent on the narcissist for validation.
- Gossiping and Triangulation:
Narcissists engage in gossip and seek others to gossip with, ultimately using this strategy to manipulate and control relationships. By manipulating the victim’s words and spreading misinformation, narcissists ensure that others only trust their version of events, causing divisions between friends. Additionally, jealousy is used to undermine the victim’s self-confidence, with the narcissist complimenting others on their insecurities in front of the victim.
- Emotional Manipulation:
Narcissists employ emotional manipulation as a means to achieve their goals. Bargaining, guilt-tripping, and projection are common tactics they use to pressure victims into complying with their demands or breaking down their personal boundaries. By comparing the victim to others, making the victim feel indebted or highlighting past actions, the narcissist seeks to diminish the victim’s self-worth.
- Playing the Victim:
The covert narcissist, and occasionally the overt narcissist, often assumes the role of the victim to gain compassion, sympathy, and empathy from their victims. Capitalising on their victim’s ability to empathise, narcissists exploit their victims’ kindness and gradually erode their sense of self, while portraying themselves as the only ones providing support and assistance.
- False Promises:
Narcissists make promises that they do not intend to fulfil, giving their victims false hope. When questioned about these broken promises, they often provoke the victim to react, enabling them to shift blame onto the victim for their own failures.
- Hoovering Technique:
When the narcissist’s new target fails to meet their expectations, they attempt to reel their previous victim back in. Through stalking, reaching out to mutual acquaintances, missed calls, messages, and insincere apologies, they try to keep the door open to maintain control over both individuals, causing them to compete for the narcissist’s affection.
Narcissistic individuals can be experts at manipulation, luring others into their webs of deceit and control. Recognising these tactics is crucial to protecting oneself from the harm they can cause—five strategies to recover from the manipulative tactics of narcissists.
Firstly, developing self-awareness is paramount. Understanding one’s own vulnerabilities and beliefs can help identify the tactics used against them. By knowing oneself better, individuals can build the resilience necessary to resist manipulation.
Secondly, setting clear boundaries is essential. Narcissists thrive on blurring the lines between their needs and the needs of others. By establishing and enforcing personal boundaries, individuals can protect their emotional well-being and prevent narcissists from taking advantage of them.
Thirdly, seeking support from trusted friends and family is crucial. Narcissists often isolate their victims, making it harder for them to recognise the manipulation occurring. Sharing experiences and seeking advice from loved ones can provide a fresh perspective, validate one’s experiences, and offer guidance for extracting oneself from the narcissist’s grip.
Fourthly, practising self-care is a valuable strategy for recovery. Narcissistic manipulation can be emotionally and mentally draining. Engaging in activities that bring joy and fulfillment, such as hobbies, exercising, or spending time in nature, can help repair the damage inflicted by the narcissist’s tactics.
Finally, seeking professional help is essential for recovering from the trauma caused by narcissistic manipulation. Therapists specialising in narcissistic abuse can provide guidance, support, and tools for healing. They can also assist individuals in rebuilding their self-esteem and confidence, which may have been eroded over time. (Sponsored.). https://betterhelp.com/elizabethshaw
In summary, recovering from the manipulative tactics of narcissists requires self-awareness, setting clear boundaries, seeking support, practising self-care, and accessing professional help. By implementing these strategies, individuals can regain control over their lives and protect themselves from further harm.
Click the links below to join Elizabeth Shaw – Life Coach on social media, for more information on Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse.
The courses Elizabeth Shaw has available.
The full course.
The free course.
Help with overcoming trauma bonding and anxiety.
All about the narcissist Online course.
Recovery from narcissistic abuse and help with Co-Parenting.
Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with (Sponsored.) BetterHelp. where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.