Losing your fear after coming out of a narcissistic relationship, walking on eggshells, where you lived day to day on edge and living in fear of what’s next?
You may have carried that fear with you. Living in fear hurts your psychological state of mind as you’re not living in the present day of the here and now. You fear events that happened in the past or haven’t even happened.
Bring yourself back into reality. Never fear the unknown. It’s ok to be prepared for events, but don’t dream them up to actually happen. Instead, manifest thoughts of great things that are going to happen to make your reality a good one.
Your mind is your imagination, your past memories are memories of your past, yet as they are in your past, they are not happening in today, so they are an imagination of your past.
The basis of your fears is becoming lost in your imagination of your past, all those what ifs? Focus on today and not on the bad things that did happen or that could happen.
Imagination is a powerful thing when used correctly, but you need to imagine great things.
Use any fear of the unknown to your advantage, use that fear to motivate yourself, fear is a product of your imagination, do not let it control you, do not allow others to control you through fear, instead move away from those, people, protect yourself, and enjoy your new life.
Fearing something that doesn’t exist in the present doesn’t benefit you.
Fearing change, you need to embrace that fear. You need to decide to make a choice of how you want to live, who you want to be, and how you are going to do it.
On the other side of your fear, can come the most amazing and incredible things you’ll ever experience.
How to overcome anything in life, you have to take the first step, then the next and the next, until before you know it, you’ve overcome it.
Living in a relationship with real fear is not healthy, so if you’re still in it, embrace the fear of the unknown, find a safe route out. It will take steps, it will take work, but you will bring better things into your life. Being free from the narcissist will one day be the most amazing and incredible feeling, being able to be yourself again and fill your life with happiness again.
You have a body, and you have a mind to do something. If life’s not great right now, all you need to do is take the first step into a new direction, baby steps one day leaps the next, back to baby steps. Sometimes stepping sideways or taking one backwards, but get up and go again, keep taking those steps until you make it and once you do, keep taking those steps.
We all make mistakes, we all fall down, the beauty is to learn, to get back up and to go again and again until you make your dreams a reality. What if? Is no excuse. What if? It means you stopped yourself. What if? Is holding you back. Take precautions, get out safely, keep yourself safe, but never let those what-if? Moments stop you. It takes time. It doesn’t matter if you stumble on your way out. If your tried to leave a few times but failed, failure is better than nothing. Just go again until you understand it’s time to get out and start living for yourself.
Behind every fear is either a person you don’t want to be around. Or a person you now want to become.
That person who causes you fear, move away from safely.
That fear of leaving is preventing you from becoming who you indeed are.
When you fall down, you stand back up. When you release yourself from fear, you rise again.
Abuse is abuse, don’t make excuses, don’t rationalise, don’t accept being disrespected, don’t accept less than you deserve.
The first step is to take action, and you may need to plan a safe route out.
Once you are out, be cautious and be prepared. Other than that, don’t let your fears hold you back. You’ve made the biggest step, now keep going, onwards and upwards.
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Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.