When you’ve had the willingness and ability to endure suffering to help others, not having a day off in years, because you were so determined to make the relationship work, to help them any way you can, to change everything about you to make that relationship last, wow, you are amazing, you are strong, and you are full of character, to not only endure that pain but to keep going to try and build on those hopes and dreams.
The real journey begins when you wake one morning to realise you were so driven and focused on making it work. In that journey, you’ve been manipulated into losing yourself along the way. You have run out of ideas on how to make it work, and you have no more to give. You’re simply sick and tired of being sick and tired. You’ve had enough of that emotional rollercoaster, and it’s been one heck of a ride. You’ve had enough of going around in circles and getting nowhere.
You finally hit a wall, and you finally get mad with yourself for allowing yourself to participate. You’re no longer willing to play along with their sick and twisted games that you now clearly see for yourself. As hard as it is, as painful as it is, you take that last little bit of your strength that remains deep inside, and you let go of the hope it could be different. You’re that miserable. You have no choice but to choose yourself.
Then once out, you’re left wondering, who are they? What are they? Who am I? What actually happened? You start to search for answers and discover the truth. You see exactly who they are, what they do, why you feel how you do.
Then the real journey begins, lessons learned along your life’s journey, you’re getting stronger and wiser every day, step by step building yourself, and your life back up, into who you want to be and where you want to go, making new dreams and new destinations.
The questions you ask yourself now, those answers you give yourself now, will determine the course of your new life. You’re wiser than you were before. Listen to your instinct. Listen to yourself. So you might have been asking yourself. What can I do to make the narcissist happy? Then you did it, and then you found yourself circling around, changing time and time again and getting nowhere. Now start asking yourself. What can I do to make myself happy? Then take action on it and keep going until you find what things make you happy, what your passion is, rediscover your own values, your own dreams, your own boundaries, your own loves, you might think you walked away from the relationship, an empty shell of your former self. Stop and think of it as. I can start over from scratch, so much wiser than I was before, I can fill myself up with who I want to be, what I want to do with my life.
So now you need to hold your head high, put in maximum effort into yourself, then keep going. It doesn’t matter where you’ve been or what you’ve been through. The past is in the past. It doesn’t tell you where you’re going to end up. It doesn’t have to define you. All you need to take from it is the lessons learnt of people you no longer want to associate yourself with anymore. Take from it, just how amazing, patient, strong, loving and kind you genuinely are. Your potential is limitless. Everything you do now, you have a choice. Because of your past, you’ll listen to that gut, and you’ll make wise choices, grow into a stronger, happier person than you ever was before.
Remember, it’s not about who you are today, it’s about who you want to become, then when you get there, and it’s about what you want next, keep going, keep driving yourself forward, to achieve great things for you.
Believe in yourself, you can, and you will.
Remember Albert Einstein’s quote.
“Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.”
You are limitless. Keep going. You’ve got this.
Creating your boundaries.
Twelve types of people to avoid.
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The online courses available by Elizabeth Shaw.
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For the free course.
To help with overcoming the trauma bond and anxiety course.
All about the narcissist Online course.
The narcissists counter-parenting.
Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.
How A Narcissist Invalidates You.
Detach your thoughts.