One of the most important steps to recovery after been in a relationship with a narcissist, is who are you listening to.
First you need to start listening to your own intuition. That’s your internal sat nav telling you what you need to do,
Then listen to those who have been there and come out the other side, they understand you and everything that’s happened to you, they know how you feel as they too have felt that way, but only take what applies to you. Although narcissist are the same everyone situation is slightly different. What works for someone may not work as well for another. Just like some are so dangerous you have to move miles away and no contact for the children. Some can just manage parallel parenting, it’s not easy. Don’t listen to people who haven’t been their about parenting as they will not understand.
Advice from qualified people who understand narcissism, they have to know what the trauma bond is. The Stockholm syndrome is.
Friends and family may mean well but if they have not been through it they don’t understand enough to help you in the right way.
Learn what you need to know. Take a break from it if you need to, grieve, scream, shout, cry. Dance in the rain, go for a run, put some music on, hug your kids. Read a good book whatever helps you get through. There’s always room to grow and always something new to learn. It’s about you and your journey and what makes you happy.
Start changing your mindset to a positive one, I’ll put glimpses on here of what happened with my narcissist not often, just because some might be able to relate to a similar experience, don’t take the negative from it, I’ve grown stronger and in so many ways, its just remind you that you are not alone.