Sometimes you can parallel parent, hold your head high, hand over your children, ignore the bullsxxt and counteract it with your children.
Sometimes other safeguarding issues are in place, so you have to drop off and collect children in a busy place.
Sometimes, a bigger safeguarding issue arises, where the children have to visit the other parent with a safe person always around.
Sometimes, safeguarding issues are that big they can only see the other parent in a contact centre.
Sometimes the safeguarding issues are that big, and the children simply can not see the other parent as it’s too dangerous.
Then the extreme cases where you have to move miles away.
Whichever contact or no contact you and the children have with the other parent is fine as although all narcissists have similar traits, they all have different levels of manipulation and violence.
Whatever your personal situation, keep as much as possible in writing from the start, In case the children need to see this when they are older, be prepared for an upsetting sincere heart-to-heart with the children when they ask, just give age-appropriate answers.
One thing that is the same in all of these situations, is the narcissist will never see it as being a problem caused by them, they will lay all the blame on you. They will twist it all around on you, to your face and behind your back.
So stay strong, trust yourself, know you are doing the best for your children, and get extra help for yourself and your children if needed. Keep going. It will be ok. A child can grow and will thrive with one stable, happy parent, even if they see the other parent once a year, once a month, once a week, or never. You have got this, now is the time to believe in yourself.
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Hello, I’m Liz. I'm the slightly 🙄 dyslexic Blogger (So my grammar and punctuation aren't always the best.) who enjoys writing, and if I can overcome my fears and do it anyway, so can you. I have a YouTube channel which being dyslexic, my words are not always pronounced correctly, yet I still have some fantastic support from a fantastic community of survivors. If you want to do anything in life, half the battle is facing your fears and getting started. I am not a Doctor or a Councillor. I'm a mum and get the pleasure to raise five incredible boys. I'm a life coach. I’m a survivor of narcissistic abuse. I would like to raise as much awareness as possible about the Narcissist Personality Disorder, to give people more understanding of what they've been through, more knowledge so hopefully, people know the signs so don’t get involved in the first place, ways to get out safely, help with all the counter-parenting the narcissist throws in, help with whoever the narcissist is in your life, and most importantly recovery from narcissistic abuse, so you can move past it and have an incredible life that you do deserve.💜
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