9 Unbelievable Narcissistic Behaviours

Narcissists can be enigmatic and perplexing, often leaving those around them bewildered and hurt. Their behaviours can be extreme, unexpected, and destructive. Here, we delve into nine particularly unbelievable narcissistic behaviours, examining how they manifest and the impact they have on those who encounter them.

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1. Jealous of Their Own Children

A behaviour that defies the natural instinct of parental pride is jealousy towards one’s own children. For a narcissist, their child’s achievements or happiness can be seen as a direct threat to their own superiority and self-worth. Instead of celebrating their child’s success, the narcissist may feel envious and seek to undermine it.

Manifestation: The narcissist may downplay the child’s achievements, take credit for their successes, or even sabotage opportunities. In extreme cases, the narcissist may project their insecurities onto the child, belittling them to maintain a sense of dominance.

Impact: This behaviour can deeply scar the child, leading to issues with self-esteem, self-worth, and confidence. The constant need for validation from a parent who is inherently unsupportive can create lifelong emotional challenges.

2. Walking Ahead

Walking ahead, rather than alongside loved ones, is a subtle but telling behaviour of a narcissist. It symbolises superiority, control, and a lack of regard for others.

Manifestation: During outings, the narcissist might consistently walk ahead, ignoring their companions. This action sends a clear message that they are more important and that others must follow their lead.

Impact: This behaviour can make those around the narcissist feel insignificant and disregarded. It fosters feelings of resentment and lowers the morale of those who feel they are constantly being left behind, both literally and metaphorically.

3. Impressing Strangers Over Caring for Their Own Family

A narcissist often places more importance on the opinions of strangers than on the well-being of their own family. Their need for external validation can overshadow their responsibilities and affection towards their loved ones.

Manifestation: The narcissist might go out of their way to be charming and helpful to strangers while neglecting or mistreating their family. They may prioritise social gatherings, work, or public appearances over family time, seeking admiration from outsiders.

Impact: Family members may feel neglected, unappreciated, and unloved. This behaviour can create a rift in family relationships, as loved ones struggle with the constant feeling of being second-best to strangers.

4. Ruining Special Occasions

Special occasions that should be filled with joy and celebration often become battlegrounds when a narcissist is involved. Their need for attention and control can turn even the happiest events into moments of stress and conflict.

Manifestation: The narcissist might start arguments, create drama, or engage in attention-seeking behaviour during birthdays, holidays, or celebrations. They may belittle the event or the people involved, ensuring that the focus remains on their discontent.

Impact: This behaviour can ruin the joy of special occasions, leaving lasting negative memories. It creates an environment where family and friends are constantly on edge, anticipating the next disruption, and can lead to a desire to avoid celebrations altogether.

5. Not Answering Simple Questions

A common tactic of narcissists is to avoid answering straightforward questions. This behaviour is often a form of control, as it keeps others guessing and demonstrates the narcissist’s power to withhold information.

Manifestation: The narcissist might respond to simple questions with vagueness, deflection, or outright refusal to answer. They may use this tactic in conversations to frustrate, confuse, or maintain an air of superiority.

Impact: This behaviour can be incredibly frustrating for others, leading to feelings of confusion and helplessness. It undermines clear communication and fosters an environment of mistrust and uncertainty.

6. Mocking with Noises

Mocking others through noises rather than words is a particularly childish and demeaning tactic used by narcissists. It serves to belittle and humiliate the target, making them feel inferior and ridiculous.

Manifestation: The narcissist might mimic sounds, make sarcastic noises, or use exaggerated tones to mock someone. This can occur during arguments, in response to someone’s ideas, or even in casual conversation.

Impact: This behaviour can deeply hurt and embarrass the person being mocked. It erodes their confidence and can make them hesitant to express themselves or share their thoughts in the future, fearing ridicule and humiliation.

7. Silent Treatments

The silent treatment is a classic narcissistic tactic used to punish and control. By refusing to communicate, the narcissist creates a power imbalance, leaving the other person in a state of emotional limbo.

Manifestation: The narcissist might suddenly stop speaking to someone without explanation, ignoring their attempts to communicate and acting as if they do not exist. This can last for hours, days, or even weeks.

Impact: The silent treatment can be incredibly distressing, causing the victim to feel isolated, anxious, and desperate for resolution. It disrupts the flow of healthy communication and can lead to emotional dependency as the victim tries to win back the narcissist’s favour.

8. Dry Begging

Dry begging is a manipulative tactic where the narcissist hints or complains about their needs and desires without directly asking for help, prompting others to offer assistance out of guilt or pity.

Manifestation: The narcissist might make indirect statements about their hardships or desires, expecting others to pick up on the cues and offer support or gifts. For example, they might lament about financial struggles or express envy over someone else’s possessions.

Impact: This behaviour manipulates others into providing help or gifts, often leaving them feeling used and manipulated. It exploits the empathy and generosity of others, fostering resentment and mistrust over time.

9. Weaponised Incompetence

Weaponised incompetence involves pretending to be incapable of performing tasks to avoid responsibility or burdening others with additional work. This behaviour is a form of manipulation that allows the narcissist to shirk duties while maintaining control.

Manifestation: The narcissist might deliberately perform tasks poorly or claim ignorance to avoid taking on responsibilities. This can happen in various settings, including household chores, work duties, or personal tasks.

Impact: This behaviour places an unfair burden on others, who must pick up the slack and deal with the consequences of the narcissist’s feigned incompetence. It creates an imbalance in relationships and can lead to frustration, burnout, and resentment.

Understanding and Coping with Narcissistic Behaviors

Understanding these narcissistic behaviours is crucial for anyone dealing with a narcissist. Recognising the tactics used can help in developing strategies to cope and protect oneself from their damaging effects. Here are some ways to handle these behaviours:

1. Set Clear Boundaries

Establishing and enforcing clear boundaries is essential when dealing with a narcissist. Make it known what behaviors are unacceptable, and stick to your limits. Be firm and consistent in maintaining these boundaries to protect your emotional well-being.

2. Seek Support

Having a support system is vital. Friends, family, or a therapist can provide the validation and understanding needed to navigate interactions with a narcissist. Sharing experiences with others can also offer new perspectives and coping strategies.

3. Practice Self-Care

Prioritising self-care is important for maintaining emotional health. Engage in activities that bring joy and relaxation, and ensure you are taking care of your physical and mental well-being. Self-care helps in building resilience against the narcissist’s manipulative behaviours.

4. Stay Informed

Educate yourself about narcissistic personality disorder and its behaviours. Understanding the disorder can demystify the narcissist’s actions and provide insights into their motivations, making it easier to detach emotionally and respond appropriately.

5. Develop Assertiveness

Being assertive allows you to communicate your needs and boundaries effectively. Practice assertive communication to express yourself clearly and confidently without being aggressive. This helps in standing your ground and reducing the narcissist’s control over you.

6. Limit Engagement

Whenever possible, limit your interactions with the narcissist. Minimising contact can reduce the opportunities for manipulation and emotional abuse. In cases where contact is unavoidable, such as with a family member or coworker, keep interactions brief and focused on necessary topics.

7. Document Interactions

Keeping a record of interactions with the narcissist can be helpful, especially in situations where manipulation and gaslighting are common. Documenting incidents provides clarity and evidence, which can be useful in validating your experiences and seeking support.

8. Focus on Facts

When dealing with a narcissist, stick to the facts and avoid getting drawn into emotional arguments. Narcissists thrive on emotional reactions, so maintaining a factual and objective approach can help in diffusing their manipulative tactics.

9. Plan an Exit Strategy

In some cases, the best course of action is to distance yourself from the narcissist entirely. If the relationship is causing significant harm and there is little hope for improvement, consider planning an exit strategy. This might involve seeking legal advice, finding alternative living arrangements, or building a support network to help you transition away from the narcissist.

Narcissistic behaviours can be bewildering and damaging to those who encounter them. From jealousy towards their own children to the manipulative use of weaponised incompetence, these behaviours are driven by a deep-seated need for control and validation. Understanding these tactics is the first step in protecting oneself and developing strategies to cope with a narcissist’s influence.

By setting clear boundaries, seeking support, practising self-care, and staying informed, individuals can build resilience and maintain their emotional health in the face of narcissistic behaviours. It is important to remember that while the narcissist’s actions may be hurtful and confusing, you have the power to protect yourself.

9 Unbelievable Narcissistic Behaviours

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Boundaries with Narcissists: Safeguarding Emotional, Psychological, and Physical Independence.

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9 Unbelievable Narcissistic Behaviours