The narcissist is known for their ability to talk a great talk. They can be incredibly convincing with their lies, manipulating those around them with their words. However, their actions rarely match their words. This disconnect between what they say and what they do can be extremely confusing for those involved with a narcissist. It is only after removing oneself from the situation that the true extent of their deceit becomes apparent.
Narcissistic individuals, whether they are covert or overt, believe they are superior and entitled. They operate under the assumption that the world owes them something, and they should not have to answer to anyone. Covert narcissists are often harder to identify, as they generally do not possess the charm or charisma that overt narcissists use to manipulate others. However, both types of narcissists can exaggerate, play the victim, and manipulate those around them to their advantage.
Covert narcissists engage in manipulative behaviour that is carried out in secret. This makes it difficult for those close to them to understand what is truly happening. They are masters at playing the victim, making it seem as though they are the ones being wronged. Overt narcissists, on the other hand, are more brazen and brutal in their manipulation tactics. They often have a group of supporters who enable their behaviour due to their charming and charismatic personality.
One of the ways in which narcissists manipulate and brainwash their victims is through their use of toxic and manipulative language. They will emotionally and psychologically abuse their victims through coercive control, only to gaslight them by blaming them for the abuse and insisting they are confused. By saying they love their victims while treating them poorly, narcissists are able to confuse and destabilise their victims’ sense of reality. This is a cruel tactic that further reinforces the narcissist’s power and control over their victim.
Narcissists, whether covert or overt, are experts in using words to manipulate others. They employ a tactic known as “Narcissistic word salad,” in which they throw out a stream of disconnected conversations that confuse and divert attention from the original topic of conversation. This often leads to verbal arguments that leave the victim feeling even more confused and overwhelmed. The narcissist will then accuse the victim of always creating arguments, furthering their control and manipulation.
Word salad is used by narcissists to create an alternative reality in which they are not at fault for their actions. They will twist the conversation to avoid taking responsibility for their behaviour or provoking a reaction from their victims. By doing so, they can shift the blame onto the victim, making them doubt their own sanity and perception of reality. This rewriting of history is a way for the narcissist to escape accountability for their actions.
Individuals with narcissistic traits often employ various techniques to create word salad during conversations. Here are some common ones:
- Deflection: They deflect from the topic at hand by introducing unrelated ideas, often to avoid addressing uncomfortable or challenging questions. By changing the subject, they distract from the original topic and confuse the conversation.
- Tangential rambling: They engage in tangents and go off on unrelated or lengthy monologues, making it difficult for others to follow their train of thought or maintain coherence. This strategy allows them to maintain control and dominance in the conversation.
- Overuse of jargon or excessive details: Narcissistic individuals may use sophisticated or technical language to intentionally confuse others. By incorporating jargon or providing irrelevant details, they create a sense of confusion, making it hard for others to decipher their true message.
- Gaslighting: This is a manipulative tactic where the narcissistic individual intentionally distorts or denies reality, making others question their own sanity or memory. They may twist facts, contradict themselves, or undermine others’ perspectives, creating confusion and doubt.
- Intricate wordplay: Narcissists may use intricate wordplay, double entendre, or complex language to confuse others and maintain control over the conversation. This can be used as a means of subtle manipulation or as a defence mechanism to evade accountability.
- Cognitive dissonance: They may present contradictory or inconsistent statements, leaving others confused and unable to make sense of their arguments. This can lead to a state of cognitive dissonance, where conflicting information creates confusion and makes it harder to challenge their viewpoints.
It is important to note that while these techniques are commonly observed in individuals with narcissistic traits, not all narcissistic individuals employ word salad in conversations, and these techniques can be employed by others for various reasons as well.
When engaged in a conversation or disagreement with a narcissist, it is important to watch for patterns of behaviour. Genuine people will be willing to compromise and reflect on their mistakes, whereas narcissists will employ manipulative tactics such as interrupting, changing the topic, accusing, blaming, and using word salad to confuse and frustrate their victims. It can be challenging to recognise and navigate these manipulative tactics, which is why many people end up questioning themselves and their own sanity when dealing with a narcissistic individual.
In addition to word salad, narcissists also use their manipulative language to provoke anger, resentment, and guilt within their victims. They will exploit their victims’ vulnerabilities and use them against them, causing them to doubt themselves and feel ashamed. This transfer of shame and guilt onto the victim further reinforces the narcissist’s power and control over them.
Dealing with a narcissist can be incredibly challenging and emotionally draining. Their ability to manipulate and brainwash keeps their victims trapped in a cycle of confusion and self-doubt. However, it is possible to regain control and recover from the effects of narcissistic abuse. Writing down the narcissist’s false promises and lies, alongside the truths of their actions, can help victims restore their sense of reality and regain their power.
In conclusion, narcissists are skilled at talking a great talk, but their actions rarely align with their words. They use covert and overt manipulative tactics to confuse and brainwash their victims, employing toxic and manipulative language such as word salad. By rewriting reality and shifting blame onto their victims, narcissists maintain control and power over those around them. It is crucial to recognise and understand these manipulative tactics in order to break free from their grip and reclaim one’s sense of self. Recovery is possible, and it begins with recognising the truth of a narcissist’s actions and standing strong in one’s own reality.
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Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.