Have you ever found yourself caught up in a narcissist’s social media mind games? It can be a confusing and hurtful experience that leaves you feeling drained and unsure of what to do next.
Social media is a powerful tool that narcissists use to manipulate their victims. They may post flattering pictures of themselves to gain attention and admiration or use social media as a way to control and monitor your behaviour.
Social media has become a popular platform for people to connect and build relationships with others worldwide. However, for narcissists, this platform has become a tool to manipulate and control others this article is to explore a few ways they do this.
Love bombing.
Love bombing is a tactic that narcissists use to overwhelm their targets with excessive attention and affection in order to gain their trust and admiration. Social media provides the perfect arena for this behaviour because it allows narcissists to easily broadcast their idealised version of themselves to a wide audience.
One common way that narcissists use social media to love bombs is by flooding their targets with compliments and messages that make them feel special and appreciated. They may use flattery, flirtatious messages, and emojis to create a false sense of intimacy and closeness. For example, a narcissistic ex-partner may send their former lover rapid-fire messages declaring their undying love and devotion, despite having caused significant pain and heartache in the past.
Another tactic that narcissists use to love bomb on social media is by constantly posting about their own achievements and accolades, to create an image of themselves as successful and accomplished. This constant self-promotion can make it seem like the narcissist is living an extraordinary life and can lead potential new targets to believe that they too, can be a part of that glamorous and exciting lifestyle.
Another way that narcissists love bomb is through excessive posting in a relationship. They will flood their social media with posts about their partner, claiming that they are everything to them and the love of their life. These posts are often public displays of affection meant to show the world that they have the perfect relationship. They will post about how much they love their new partner, how lucky they are to have them, and how they couldn’t imagine life without them. These declarations of love are often meant to validate their own feelings and to, elicit praise from others, and, if possible, devalue and make an ex feel insignificant. As Unfortunately, these grand displays of affection are often short-lived and a means to an end for narcissists. Once they have gained control over their victim, the love bombing will stop, leaving their partner confused and hurt.
So, if you notice your partner using social media to excessively post about your relationship or making grand declarations of love, it’s important to take a step back and evaluate the situation. Don’t let love bombing cloud your judgment, and remember that true love and affection are not measured by the number of posts on social media.
Replace.
Narcissists also use social media to replace their victims. It’s sadly a common occurrence, and it can be quite hurtful to the person being replaced.
Narcissists use social media as a means to an end, seeking and learning all about their new supply.
Narcissists often use social media as a way to seek out new sources of admiration and validation. They may post pictures and updates that project an image of themselves as happy, successful, and attractive in order to garner attention and praise from others.
At the same time, they may use social media to devalue and discard their current victim. They might start posting pictures with new friends or love interests, making it clear that they are moving on from their former partner or friend.
It can be incredibly hurtful to see someone you cared about so easily replace you. But it’s important to remember that the problem lies with the narcissist, not with you. They are simply using social media as a tool to manipulate others and feed their own egos.
If you have experienced this kind of behaviour from a narcissist, it’s important to take care of yourself. Unfollowing or blocking them on social media may be a good place to start, as it can help you avoid triggers and limit your exposure to their negative behaviour.
Devalue.
Narcissists also use social media to further devalue and invalidate their partners.
One way that narcissists use social media to devalue their partners is by liking other people’s posts. This can include flirting with or excessively complimenting other users. By doing so, the narcissist is trying to make their partner feel insignificant and unimportant, while simultaneously putting themselves in a superior position. They may even go as far as to leave comments that are clearly meant to be hurtful or belittling towards their partner.
Another tactic that narcissists often use is ignoring their victims on social media. This can be done by refusing to reply to messages, avoiding tagging them in posts, or just blatantly blocking them altogether. By doing so, the narcissist is trying to assert their dominance and control over their partner, making them feel isolated and alone.
Gaslighting their partners, blocking, then unblocking, while claiming they never blocked in the first place, or accusing you of being the one who blocked them.
One of the most insidious ways that narcissists use social media to devalue their partners is by publicly humiliating them. This can include sharing private details about their relationship or airing their dirty laundry for all to see. By doing so, the narcissist is trying to make their partner feel embarrassed and powerless, while simultaneously painting themselves as the hero or victim in the situation.
Narcissists may also use social media to manipulate their partners by controlling their access to it. This can include demanding their passwords or requiring them to ask permission before posting anything. By doing so, the narcissist is trying to restrict their partner’s independence and autonomy, making it easier for them to stay in control.
Discard.
Narcissists also use social media as a tool to discard their partners. If you’ve been in a relationship with a narcissistic partner before, then you’re probably familiar with the feeling of being blocked on social media and how hurtful it can be.
Blocking is a common tactic that narcissists use to discard their partners. Whether it’s on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or other social platforms, blocking someone is a way for narcissists to cut off communication with their partners and gain a sense of control. The act of blocking someone on social media can be seen as a method of devaluing and discarding them, which is a key characteristic of narcissistic behaviour. (This is not to be confused with the no-contact rule. Narcissists block for control over you. You block to take back control over your life.) For example, let’s say you’re in a relationship with a narcissistic partner, and you get into an argument. The narcissist may use this opportunity to block you on social media, which is their way of punishing you for not agreeing with them. They may even use the block as a way to manipulate and control you, by suggesting that if you behave differently, they might unblock you.
The problem with blocking on social media is that it can be very hurtful, even though it may seem like a small thing. When you’re blocked, you’re effectively cut off from all communication with your partner, and you may feel abandoned. If you’re someone who spends a lot of time on social media, being blocked can feel like a form of social exile.
Another way that narcissists use social media to discard their partners is by simply ignoring them. This can be just as hurtful as blocking, if not more so. If your narcissistic partner is constantly checking their phone and responding to messages, but ignoring you, this can be incredibly painful. It’s a sign that they don’t value your relationship and don’t care about your feelings.
It’s important to remember that narcissists often use social media as a way to control their victims and reinforce their power dynamic. If you notice this behaviour in someone you know, it’s important to set boundaries and take steps to protect yourself.
The bottom line is that narcissists often use social media to discard their partners, and blocking is just one of the many tools they use. If you’re in a relationship with a narcissistic partner, it’s important to recognise the signs of their behavior and take steps to protect yourself. Remember, you deserve to be with someone who values you and treats you with respect.
Intermittent reinforcement.
Narcissists often use social media as a tool for intermittent reinforcement. This means that they will give their victim positive attention and validation intermittently, creating a sense of unpredictability and uncertainty in their victim. This can make the victim feel like they are constantly seeking approval from the narcissist and can create a cycle of dependence.
For example, a narcissist may “like” all of their victim’s posts for a few days, followed by a period of silence or criticism. This creates a sense of uncertainty in the victim – they never know when the narcissist will give them positive attention again, so they may feel like they have to constantly seek it out.
Smear campaign.
Have you ever been the victim of a smear campaign on social media from a narcissist? Unfortunately, this is becoming a common occurrence in today’s digital age. Narcissists often use social media as a tool to manipulate and control their victims, as well as to gain support from others.
One way that narcissists use social media in their smear campaigns is by spreading false information about their victims. For example, they may post misleading or outright untrue statements about their victim in order to tarnish their reputation. This can include negative reviews or comments on their business or personal pages or even spreading rumours about them to mutual friends or acquaintances.
Another tactic that narcissists use is gaslighting. They may post photos or messages that are intended to make the victim feel as though they are crazy or overly emotional. This can be especially effective if the victim is already vulnerable or struggling emotionally.
Social media can also be used by narcissists to smear their victims by “recruiting” others to their side. They may post about their victim in a way that makes it seem like they are the victim and then rally their friends and family to support them. This can be especially harmful if the victim is already isolated or vulnerable, as it can make them feel as though they are truly alone in their struggles.
Lastly, narcissists may use social media to stalk or harass their victims. They may post photos, messages, or comments that are intended to intimidate or scare the victim. This can be especially harmful if the victim is feeling trapped or unsafe.
Overall, it’s important to recognise the tactics that narcissists may use on social media in order to protect yourself from their smear campaigns. If you or someone you know is experiencing this type of behaviour, it’s essential to reach out for help and support. Remember, you deserve to feel safe and respected both online and offline.
Stalking.
Have you ever felt like someone is constantly watching your every move on social media? If you have, then you might be a victim of narcissistic behavior. Narcissists are known to use social media platforms like Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter to stalk their victims.
It’s very common for narcissists to use social media to spy on their victims. They can’t resist the urge to check up on their prey, even when they know they should stop. They’ll go to great lengths to monitor their victim’s posts, messages, and activities.
If you’ve been in a relationship with a narcissist, then you’ve probably experienced this behaviour firsthand. Even if you’ve blocked them on social media, they’ll find a way to see what you’re up to. They’ll use fake profiles, and mutual friends, or even create new accounts just to keep tabs on you.
Narcissists will stalk their victims on social media for many reasons. They might want to see if you’re dating someone new or if you’re having fun without them. They might also be looking for an opportunity to make contact and try to suck you back into their world.
But you don’t have to be a victim forever. Here are some tips to help you stop a narcissist from stalking you on social media:
- Block them on all social media platforms
- Change your privacy settings to limit what they can see
- Don’t engage with them online, even if they try to contact you
- Be careful about what you post online and who you share it with
Remember, you have the power to take control of your social media presence. Don’t let a narcissist invade your personal space and control your life. Stay strong and know that you deserve to live your life on your own terms.
Hoovering.
Hoovering is the act of trying to suck your ex-partner or friend back into the relationship or friendship after they have ended it. Narcissists use this tactic to regain power, control, and attention. Social media platforms give them easy access to their victims and allow them to maintain contact even after the relationship has ended.
Narcissists use a variety of tactics on social media to hoover their victims. They may post pictures or status updates specifically designed to appeal to their victim’s emotions, reminding them of the good times and making them feel nostalgic. They may also send messages or comment on their victim’s posts, showing fake concern or interest in their lives to try and regain their trust.
One of the most common tactics narcissists use is triangulation. They may post pictures with new partners or friends, making their ex-partner or friend jealous and showing them what they are missing out on. This can cause their victims to doubt their decision to end the relationship or friendship, making it them more susceptible to hoovering.
It’s important to recognise these tactics and set boundaries to protect yourself. Block and unfollow the narcissist on all social media platforms, and if necessary, consider deleting your accounts altogether. It may also be helpful to seek support from a therapist or support group to help process your feelings and move forward.
In conclusion, it’s important to be aware of the ways in which narcissists can manipulate and control people through social media. By recognising the signs of love bombing, devaluing, discarding, intermittent reinforcement, stalking, smear campaigns and hoovering, and cutting off contact with toxic individuals, we can protect ourselves and maintain healthy relationships with those who truly care for us. Let’s use social media to connect in positive and constructive ways, and avoid those who seek to exploit our vulnerabilities for their own gain.
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Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.
