Narcissism is a personality trait that is characterised by a grandiose sense of self-importance, a need for excessive admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. The term narcissism comes from Greek mythology, where Narcissus was a young man who fell in love with his own reflection in a pool of water and eventually died because he could not tear himself away from it.
In the world of psychology, narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a recognised mental health condition that falls on a spectrum. Within this spectrum, there are two main types of narcissism: covert and overt. While both covert and overt narcissists share some common traits, there are key differences in how they manifest their narcissism.
Covert narcissists tend to be introverted, shy, and more understated in their behaviour. They may come across as being humble and self-effacing, but underneath this facade lies a deep-seated need for admiration and validation. Covert narcissists often have low self-esteem and harbour feelings of inadequacy, which they try to mask by seeking attention and approval from others.
On the other hand, overt narcissists are extroverted, grandiose, and more openly display their narcissistic traits. They have an inflated sense of self-esteem and are self-assured in their abilities. Overt narcissists do not hesitate to brag about their accomplishments or seek out praise and admiration from others.
One of the key differences between covert and overt narcissism lies in their manipulative behaviour. Covert narcissists are subtle and underhand in their manipulations, using tactics such as dry begging (hinting at their needs without directly asking for them), weaponised incompetence (acting helpless to elicit help from others), dog-whistling (making veiled racist or sexist remarks), guilt trips, emotional blackmail, and playing the victim to gain sympathy.
Overt narcissists, on the other hand, are more openly aggressive in their manipulations. They may resort to threats and intimidation to get what they want, and they are less concerned about hiding their true intentions. Overt narcissists may also play the victim, but in a more obvious and self-aggrandising manner, using their victimhood as a way to avoid taking responsibility for their actions.
While both covert and overt narcissists may play the victim, their motivations behind doing so are different. Covert narcissists play the victim to gain sympathy and attention from others, while overt narcissists may use victimhood as a way to manipulate situations and avoid facing consequences for their actions.
In terms of self-awareness, covert narcissists are more aware of their behaviour and manipulative games. They are adept at reading social cues and adjusting their tactics to get what they want. Overt narcissists, on the other hand, may be less aware of how their behaviour affects others and are more likely to act impulsively without considering the consequences.
Covert narcissists often experience a pervasive sense of emptiness and loneliness despite their outward appearance of humility. They may struggle with feelings of unworthiness and inadequacy, which drive their constant need for external validation. Overt narcissists, on the other hand, have a more arrogant and grandiose sense of self, which serves as a shield against their inner insecurities.
One of the biggest challenges in dealing with covert narcissists is their ability to fly under the radar and manipulate others without being detected. Their subtle and insidious tactics can make it difficult for those around them to recognise their true intentions. Overt narcissists, on the other hand, are more easily identifiable due to their blatant displays of grandiosity and self-centeredness.
In conclusion, while both covert and overt narcissists share common traits, such as a need for admiration and a lack of empathy, there are key differences in how they manifest their narcissism. Covert narcissists are more subtle and manipulative, while overt narcissists are more openly aggressive and self-assured. Understanding these differences can help individuals better navigate relationships with narcissistic individuals and protect themselves from being manipulated.
The Differences Between Covert And Overt Narcissistic Behaviour.
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Boundaries with Narcissists: Safeguarding Emotional, Psychological, and Physical Independence.
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