The Devaluation Game: 8 Common Tactics Narcissists Use to Manipulate and Control Their Victims.

Narcissists have an inclination to manipulate and devalue those around them in order to boost their own egos. They use various tactics to achieve this, from consistent criticism to emotional manipulation. In this article, we will explore eight common tactics narcissists use to devalue their victims.

Consistent criticism about your flaws:

One of the most common tactics narcissists use to devalue their victims is by consistently criticising their flaws. Whether it be physical appearance, intelligence, personality traits, or actions, the narcissist will always find something to pick on. This constant barrage of criticism can be emotionally draining and can lead to low self-esteem and self-doubt in the victim.

For example, a narcissist may constantly comment on their partner’s weight, telling them they need to lose a few pounds. This criticism may be disguised as concern for their health, but in reality, it is just a way for the narcissist to exert control and make the victim feel inadequate.

Belittle your accomplishments:

Narcissists thrive on being the centre of attention and will go to great lengths to belittle the accomplishments of those around them. Whether it be in the workplace, social settings, or personal achievements, the narcissist will always find a way to undermine your successes.

For example, if you receive a promotion at work, the narcissist may downplay your achievement by saying it was just luck or that you don’t deserve it. They may even try to take credit for your success, claiming that they had a hand in it.

Gaslighting:

Gaslighting is a manipulative tactic used by narcissists to make their victims doubt their own reality. They will twist the truth, deny their own actions, and make the victim question their own memories and perceptions.

For example, if a narcissist cheats on their partner and is caught in the act, they may try to gaslight the victim by saying it never happened or that they are imagining things. This can leave the victim feeling confused and unsure of what really happened, which plays right into the narcissist’s hands.

Scapegoating:

Narcissists often scapegoat others in order to deflect attention away from themselves. They will blame their problems and shortcomings on someone else, making the victim an easy target for their frustrations and insecurities.

For example, if a narcissist fails at a project at work, they may blame their colleague for not helping enough or sabotaging their efforts. This not only shifts the blame away from the narcissist but also puts the victim in a position where they have to defend themselves against false accusations.

Withhold attention, affection and support:

Narcissists thrive on attention and admiration, so when they feel their ego is being threatened, they will withhold affection, attention, and support from their victims. This can leave the victim feeling isolated, unloved, and unworthy.

For example, a narcissist may give their partner the silent treatment for days on end after a disagreement, leaving them feeling lonely and desperate for their attention. This tactic can be incredibly damaging to the victim’s emotional well-being and can lead to feelings of abandonment and rejection.

Undermine:

Narcissists will often undermine the confidence and abilities of their victims in order to keep them under their control. They will question the victim’s decisions, abilities, and judgment, making them doubt themselves and rely on the narcissist for guidance.

For example, a narcissist may constantly question their partner’s parenting skills, making them doubt their ability to raise their children. This can lead to the victim becoming dependent on the narcissist for validation and approval, further cementing their control over them.

Play the victim:

Narcissists are masters at playing the victim card in order to manipulate those around them. They will twist situations to make themselves appear as the victim, garnering sympathy and support from others while deflecting attention from their own toxic behaviours.

For example, if a narcissist gets caught lying to their friends, they may play the victim by saying they were just trying to protect someone else or that they were forced into a corner. This manipulation tactic allows the narcissist to avoid taking responsibility for their actions and gain sympathy from those around them.

Comparisons:

Narcissists will often compare their victims to others in order to make them feel inadequate and unworthy. They will point out the strengths and successes of others while highlighting the flaws and shortcomings of the victim, creating a sense of competition and insecurity.

For example, a narcissist may constantly compare their partner to an ex-lover, pointing out how much better they were in certain aspects. This can lead the victim to question their own worth and value in the relationship, playing right into the narcissist’s hands.

Emotional manipulation:

Perhaps one of the most insidious tactics narcissists use to devalue their victims is emotional manipulation. They will use guilt, fear, and shame to control and manipulate those around them, making them feel like they owe the narcissist something or that they are responsible for their happiness.

For example, a narcissist may threaten to leave their partner if they don’t comply with their demands, playing on their fear of abandonment to get what they want. This emotional manipulation can leave the victim feeling trapped and powerless, unable to stand up for themselves.

In conclusion, narcissists use a variety of tactics to devalue their victims in order to boost their own egos and maintain control. From consistent criticism to emotional manipulation, these tactics are designed to keep the victim under the narcissist’s thumb and make them feel unworthy and inadequate. It is important for victims to recognise these tactics and seek help in order to break free from the toxic cycle of abuse.

8 Tactics Narcissists Use To Devalue You