Parallel parenting, communication with you ex should be business like and non emotional conflicts into life lessons.
When your children or you struggle or are hurt by your ex’s behavior, try to focus on the life lesson and not the ex’s behavior. The other parent will probably never change. So don’t focus on the negative find the positive use opportunity to help your children learn how to successfully navigate a difficult situation.
Listen to your children and how they feel what they are struggling with. Let them know they can always talk to you. Do not slate the other parent to them. Make sure you let your children know that there thoughts and feelings are valid. Let them know what they are feeling is a rational and normal response given their circumstances. Ask them questions and help them find solutions.
What did they learn? How might they handle things differently next time? What would they want to say to mom/dad next time? Is there a boundary that they need to set and how can they do that? Be patient; children love both their parents. They have their own pace for accepting the limitations of their parents and will find their own way to do so.
When you change your mindset and choose to focus on your children’s growth and development rather than your behavior, You teach children valuable life lessons around navigating difficult personalities, your children can learn to accep people as they are, and choosing your course given that reality. Parallel parenting allows you to liberate yourself from the unconstructive behaviors of your ex while minimizing the negative impact your ex has on you and your children.